As an experienced divorce solicitor in Liverpool and the surrounding areas, Tracey Miller Family Law has seen it all. And we believe that separation can absolutely be amicable. However, it often requires hard work, compromise and the ability to swallow your pride (and bite your tongue!).

Here are some tips that could help you navigate the potentially fraught minefield of divorce, and come out the other side unscathed.

Get professional counselling – before the relationship breaks down completely

If you and your partner can recognise that there’s a problem early enough, you can seek professional help. You may not be able to save the relationship, but you will have a better chance to make a mutual agreement that divorce is the best option for everyone.

This is crucial to having an amicable divorce, as you’re both starting off on the same page. According to clinical psychologist Dr Viola Drancol, in a recent article in Vogue:

“Often divorces are accompanied by emotional injuries and severe disappointments felt by one or both partners,”

“From a mental health perspective, this is the time to see a professional and to process the disappointment, mourn the losses, and eventually reach a state of acceptance and even forgiveness. Those are factors that can make a divorce more amicable.”

Mutual agreement can also speed up the divorce process considerably. If you can have honest conversations on the big decisions that need making, you can zoom through divorce – which is easier on everyone.

Get advice you can trust

There’s a huge amount of information, advice and guidance available on the internet about divorce. In fact, there’s too much. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed, and reading about what you should and shouldn’t be doing can really stress you out.

Instead, get your advice from just a handful of sources you can trust. Your divorce solicitor is the first place to direct your questions, but resources such as Resolution and even Citizens Advice can also be helpful.

Do your best to be open-minded and compassionate

This one is so much easier said than done. But if you can approach divorce with this mindset, you have a better chance of a civil relationship at the end of it all. Try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes, breathe and pause before taking any action, and remember that you once loved and respected (or still do) this person.

Build a support network

Divorce can be a lonely process, but you don’t have to do it alone. Surround yourself with caring, supportive friends and family. These are the people you pour out your grievances to (rather than starting a bitter argument with your ex) and seek comfort. Crucially, they’re the people who stop you sending that inflammatory email, and who give you the courage to take the next steps.

Liverpool divorce lawyer Tracey Miller Family Law is a member of Resolution, an organisation committed to a non-confrontational, practical approach to divorce. Get in touch with us if you need help with divorce, and we’ll guide you through the process as smoothly as possible.